I think my spleen hurts. I’m not quite sure where my spleen is, left side, \u00a0I’m pretty sure, that\u2019s why I\u2019m not 100% on the diagnosis. I fell when I was drunk a few years back; it\u2019s not like my pee is orange or has blood in it.<\/p>\n
I used to tell people that my family dies of things they put in their mouth, mostly cigarettes, but sometimes too much food or alcohol (once it was an ice pick through the mouth into the carotid, but I don\u2019t think that counts in the spirit I intended). I don\u2019t smoke. And for a long time now, I don’t drink. Mine would be the first spleen casualty, though I\u2019m pretty sure you can live without your spleen if it\u2019s removed before its rupture causes peritonitis or, more likely, exsanguination. I\u2019m sure there have been times when my liver could have been happier with me. I cross the street carefully.<\/p>\n
People want to die fast. While sleeping if possible. There will never be a DNR order on my charts. I want to live forever by any means necessary. Dulce et decorum es pro dignitas morti. Bullshit. I see no nobility in giving up. My personal black eternity happened for at least 13.6 billion years before me, and I\u2019m not looking forward to going back.<\/p>\n
On the other hand, even if you believe in all that rah! rah! Christian stuff, living forever seems like it might get boring. I get tired after an hour of sex or seven hours at Disneyland and I love both of those.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I think my spleen hurts. I’m not quite sure where my spleen is, left side, \u00a0I’m pretty sure, that\u2019s why I\u2019m not 100% on the diagnosis. I fell when I was drunk a few years back; it\u2019s not like my pee is orange or has blood in it. I used to tell people that my … <\/p>\n